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Next Ironroot Chef: Battle Rotting Fensnake

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The quest for the Next Ironroot Chef kicked into high gear last weekend with the first true elimination bout. Now the first round-winners face off against each other in a brutal bout of flavor fun.

With Emma LaBelle and Matthew Nielsen not yet knowing the sting of defeat, this week is the first opportunity to put one of them onto the path to a final showdown in Flavor Stadium.

Rotting Fensnake

This is Battle Rotting Fensnake.

Competitor Emma LaBelle

(Necrobite should be from Avacyn Restored; Swamps should be Innistrad #258.)

Founded in the months following the final Zombie Apocalypse, the Lim-Dul Memorial Zoo has entertained Endless Ranks of the Dead since its opening as the first zoo to cater entirely to the unliving. Here, you can find the most striking known examples of undead animal life, nurtured by highly qualified Infernal Caretakers and in habitats lovingly crafted by our Pit Keepers.

Zombie Apocalypse
Catch a glimpse of the majestic Rotting Mastodon in the Elephant Graveyard, or head over to the Monkey Cage to see one of Sidisi's Pets. At the Unholy Grotto, see the Gurmag Angler hunt Putrid Leeches and the Marrow Chomper sunning on the rocks. Ever seen a zombie frog beast? We have two species of anurid!

In the Noxious Fields, marvel at the awesome technique of the hunting Hollow Dogs and the grace of the Entrails Feasters that follow in their wake. Our “graviary” habitat features a comfortable cemetery where you can sit and tempt the Aphetto Vultures with tasty bits of gore. Look closely, and you may even spot a Nantuko Husk creeping among the headstones.

Every day at three o’clock, the Kheru Dreadmaws are fed Innocent Blood by a trained Carrion Feeder. If you’re lucky, you may even witness a Feeding Frenzy!

Of course, our number-one-rated attraction is our breeding pair of Rotting Fensnakes at the Spawning Pool. As you are no doubt well aware, it is very difficult for zombies to breed at all, much less in captivity. Come see the miracle of unlife unfold at our one-of-a-kind Grave Birthing exhibit.

Afterward, you can learn about the process of Necromantic Selection at our extensive Museum of Undead Zoology—or sate your Appetite for Brains at our food court!

Do you love animals? The LDMZ is now hiring! We have many research opportunities available for those who are working toward their Zombie Master’s Degree as well as entry-level positions for Graveyard Shovelers. Contact us today at rrrrghrrgl@braainnmail.com.

Competitor Matthew Nielsen

Snakes on a Plane 2: Nightmare on Innistrad: The Fensnake Returns ? Sixty-Card Casual | Matthew Nielsen

“It doesn't need to feed, but still it hungers.”

Grim Backwoods
Hot off the success of their first collaboration, next summer, Wizards of the Coast and SyFy Channel have teamed up to bring you another heaping helping of terror.

To celebrate this sure to be blockbuster, Wizards has released a promotional deck that will leave your friends asking, “Why did it have to be zombie snakes?” (Rotting Fensnake, Zombie Boa).

Just like in the movie, your opponents will learn to fear of the Grim Backwoods and Haunted Fengrafs of Innistrad.

What, you say those Swamps (Mirage #2 and #4) and Forests (Mirage Forest #2 and #3) don’t look like Innistrad? Okay, fine, large portions of filming took place in the Bayous of Jamuraa because our produce really liked the natural fog. It was not at all because filming in Jamuraa is ten times less expensive than Kessig.

If your opponents think being Lost in the Woods is their greatest problem, they’ll soon discover they’re dead wrong (Grim Discovery). These snakes were the top predators in life (Prey Upon, Wild Hunger, Predatory Hunger), but in death, nothing can stop their hunt (Undying Evil). Foot-long fangs are deadly, venom or no (Necrobite from Avacyn Restored), and even when dead, these monsters are never truly safe (Corpse Lunge). Your opponents will know true fear (Terrifying Presence), and even when they think only one remains, it will be at its most deadly (Predator's Gambit).

What? Now you’re complaining about us reusing the same tricks for shock value? Hey, they’re the classics for a reason!

Your opponents will need a Hero's Resolve or your zombie snakes will be unstoppable.

The Vote

Below, you can read the judges’ scoring to see how Nate and Stybs cast their ballots. However, this is your chance to score the winner of Battle Rotting Fensnake.

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The Judging

Nate’s Judgment

Nathan Holt @walktheplanes

Nate’s the host of Walking the Planes, a documentary series about Magic: The Gathering with a healthy dose of sketch comedy (for value).

Hoo boy, this was a close call for me! Both decks are strong but had a little room for improvement if our chefs wanted to become Master IRCs. On a different day, I might've scored differently based solely on my mood. That's how the IRC cookie crumbles sometimes, but it's also an indication of how close I think this contest is.

Emma Labelle

Rotting Fensnake is a very difficult ingredient. It's a vanilla creature. Without a sweet ability to help tell its story, you have less to go on. You have to make up the story yourself. I was expecting to see a Zombie tribal deck. That's Level 0. You went beyond that and themed the deck after non-humanoid Zombies, like our Snake, ergo "The Zombie Zoo." I consider this Level 1. But for an IRC masterpiece, I want to see more than that. I want to see the story of the Zombie Zoo play out with twists, turns, and surprises.

Like a good mirepoix or roux, your deck has the foundation for a great recipe but is still a bit of a blank canvas—a little too vanilla. How many metaphors can I mix to send this message? I don't know. Good job, but not great.

Creativity: 2

Boldness: 2

Adherence to the theme: 3

Matthew Nielsen

Great job setting up a narrative. The snake-monster flick is a fun, funny, familiar genre, and yet, it’s esoteric enough that it doesn't feel stale. Like Emma, you found the snake art in Necrobite, but you also found Wild Hunger. I like selections like that and wish there more of them—cards that reinforce the snake theme without actually being snakes or named after snakes.

You did a great job of making the snakes characters in your movie. Where are the other characters? Who's playing Samuel L Jackson (Snakes on a Plane) or Ice Cube (Anaconda)? Which one card best represents the climax of your movie? Like Emma, I see a terrific foundation for a flavor hit, but it's missing that next level. Movies have a beginning, a middle, and an end. This deck looks more like an amazing trailer. It sets the scene but falls a little short of telling a complete story.

Creativity: 2

Boldness: 2

Adherence to the theme: 3

Stybs’s Judgment

Adam Styborski @the_stybs

Adam is the Content Manager for Gathering Magic. He's a casual player at heart and weekly columnist for MagicTheGathering.com. He also travels the country for Pro Tour and Grand Prix coverage, and he shares his Pauper Cube everywhere.

Competitor Emma LaBella

Following up a knockout of an entry is always tough. With an even tougher ingredient to work with, I was slightly surprised to see Zombie tribal tumble from you. While you took it a step beyond and focused on Magic’s Zombies that aren’t humanoid, like Chairman Holt said, it seemed to be missing that extra dash of je ne sais quoi.

Perhaps the line of venom versus strength in its flavor text could propel something bigger. You hit the theme well, but it was the spice and excitement I found wanting here. Your score reflects a fine (and respectable!) showing with room to improve:

Creativity: 2

Boldness: 2

Adherence to the theme: 3

Competitor Matthew Nielsen

I’m not a movies kind of person, though I plan to make an exception for the new Star Wars film coming this month.

What I liked about your submission was taking the only bit of flavor we have and extrapolating a story off it. While gimmicky Zombie Snakes were cute, tying in the other flavorful movie moments felt right. What I didn’t like was leveraging an existing motif outright. Snakes on a Plane was part of the intentionally campy movie trend, but there’s no reason yours had to align so closely with it.

Innistrad is a place full of horrors. Where’s the terror? Where’s the creeping feeling of despair? I’d have loved some exploration using the other themes Rotting Fensnake evokes. Your score reflects a fine submission with opportunity to level it up:

Creativity: 2

Boldness: 2

Adherence to the theme: 3


Voting closes midnight Thursday, and the first winner will be announced Friday (12/10/2015). Follow @IronrootChef on Twitter for the final score and victory announcement and to share your ideas for secret ingredients. Chairman Holt will continue to use your suggestions to challenge our chefs to the core.

And if you think you have what it takes to challenge the chefs, send an email to IronrootChef AT gmail DOT com with all of your flavorful qualifications. We’re looking for new Ironroot Chefs and competitors, and you could be the next to take a shot at impressing the judges.

Join us soon for the second elimination match of the quest for the Next Ironroot Chef!


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