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Not the Boss of Me

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Ballista Charger
“Yes,” Lois says. “No. Maybe. I don’t know!”

“You just need to calm down,” you tell her.

“Can you . . .  repeat the question?” Lois asks, burying her head in her hands.

“All I asked was whether or not you were attacking this turn.”

Lois throws her hands up in frustration. “This is hard,” she whines. “My sons never told me that this game was going to be this difficult!”

You don’t answer her, mostly because you weren’t expecting your games to be easy in the first place. After all, you’re playing Lois in the second round of your local game store’s Kaladesh draft, with a slight twist: With a shortage of stock in your area, you’re using one pack of Aether Revolt and two packs of Kaladesh today.

You won your first game handily, but your second game ran a lot longer than expected, with Lois’ controlling tendencies eventually coming out on top. With less than five minutes left to play your third and final game, both of you have been racing each other from the start. Now you’re trapped in a stalemate, however, and your judge called the end of the round some time ago — your five extra turns are almost up.

Lois finally shakes her head. “I’m not attacking,” she says. “But that’s only because of your Ballista Charger. I’ll go to my second main phase and just cast the Skyswirl Harrier I just drew. It’s your turn now.”

Skyswirl Harrier
You glance at the cards in your hand. “I think I might play something before the end of your turn,” you say.

Lois blinks in frustration. “Sorry,” she says, “I should have asked. Are you going to play something?”

“How many extra turns do we have left?”

She glances at the judge, who holds up five fingers. “I’m in the fourth turn now, so your turn’s going to be the fifth and last one. What happens if one of us hasn’t won after you end your turn?”

“Then it’s a draw,” you explain. “Neither of us wins and neither of us loses.”

“Well,” Lois admits, “that doesn’t sound too bad.”

You inspect the cards in your hand once more, and then go over the cards on the table.

“You’re at 6 life, right?” you ask.

Lois visibly deflates at your question, and she buries her head in her hands once again. “You’ve got a way to win this game, don’t you?” she asks.

“I might.”

“Life is unfair,” Lois says.

Lois has just declared the end of her turn; you may still cast spells or activate abilities in response. Defeat Lois before your turn ends (and your match is declared a draw).

You are at 4 life, with the following cards in play:

You have the following cards in your hand:

You currently have no energy counters.

You do not know the identities or order of any of the remaining cards in your library.

Lois is at 6 life and has no cards in her hand. She has the following cards in play:

Lois currently has no energy counters.

If you think you’ve got a great solution in mind, don’t put it in the comments! Instead, send it to puzzles@gatheringmagic.com with the subject line “Puzzle — Not the Boss of Me” by 11:59 P.M. EST on Sunday, February 5, 2017. We’ll include the best ones in next week’s article along with the next puzzle!

Last Week’s Puzzle

Correct solutions to last week’s puzzle were received from Aaron Golas, Matthew Harvey, Russell Jones, Greg Dreher, Addison Fox, Ryou Niji, Sean Dennehy, Paul Seitz, Hyman Rosen, Subrata Sircar, Will Clendenning, Rob Spremulli, Dominic Chan, Bill Murphy, and Luke Paulsen. Michael Feldman’s solution also comes really close.

This puzzle was apparently either easy or difficult, depending on how one approached it. “Often,” Addison Fox writes, “these puzzles involve going down a rabbit hole of aggressively unintuitive and cute plays, somehow culminating in a win due to a lesser-known corner case of two cards interacting. This puzzle isn't like that: You just make your good cards big enough to survive this combat, and then hit your opponent with them.”

The problem, however, centers on exactly how you do that. Using Hyman Rosen’s base solution, we have:

  1. Tap Fairgrounds Trumpeter to crew Renegade Freighter.
  2. For 3g, cast Lifecraft Awakening targeting Servo Schematic. Servo Schematic becomes a 0/0 Construct creature with three +1/+1 counters.
  3. Block:
  4. Proceed to first strike combat damage.
  5. For 3g, cast Lifecrafter's Gift targeting Renegade Freighter.
  6. Proceed to regular combat damage.

Aaron Golas notes that you can also cast Lifecraft Awakening with X=2 here. This makes the Servo Schematic a 2/2 creature (3/3 with Lifecrafter's Gift), which means that it’ll die in combat . . .  but you’ll get a 1/1 Servo token from its death, and when you do, you’ll have 1 still available to pay for Durable Handicraft’s triggered ability.

Matthew Harvey brings this one step further: You can cast Lifecraft Awakening with X=1, making Servo Schematic a 1/1 creature (2/2 with Lifecrafter's Gift). Since the Schematic is expected to die in combat, you eventually end up with a 2/2 Servo token as well.

In fact, Greg Dreher indicates that you can cast Lifecraft Awakening with X=0! This would put Servo Schematic into your graveyard and give you a 1/1 Servo token immediately, but casting Lifecrafter's Gift on the Servo token would make this a 3/3 that can block Deadeye Harpooner and live. (Your 4/4 Aetherborn Marauder would block the 3/2 Bastion Enforcer instead.)

  1. At the beginning of Avery's end step, Fairgrounds Trumpeter triggers.Fairgrounds Trumpeter gets a +1/+1 counter, becoming 3/3.
  2. Proceed to our turn. We draw Resourceful Return.
  3. For g, cast Prey Upon targeting Aetherborn Marauder and Filigree Crawler. Filigree Crawler dies and triggers: Avery creates a 1/1 Thopter with flying. We gain 4 life, going to 5.
  4. For 1b, cast Resourceful Return targeting Fourth Bridge Prowler. Fourth Bridge Prowler returns to our hand. We draw a card from Resourceful Return.
  5. Forb, cast Fourth Bridge Prowler. Fourth Bridge Prowler enters the battlefield and triggers, targeting the Thopter token.
  6. Tap Fourth Bridge Prowler to crew Renegade Freighter.
  7. For5g, sacrifice Durable Handicraft.All our creatures get a +1/+1 counter.
  8. Attack withFairgrounds Trumpeter (4/4), Aetherborn Marauder (5/5), Servo Schematic (5/5), and Renegade Freighter (7/6). Renegade Freighter triggers, becoming 8/7 and gaining trample.
  9. Avery can block only one creature with Metalwork Colossus and so dies.

Hyman’s solution means that you can hit Avery for 14 damage (assuming that they block your largest attacker), but it’s worth noting that you’re still able to kill your opponent even if they have two blockers in play — they would take a minimum of 9 damage in that case. So technically you wouldn’t need to return the Fourth Bridge Prowler — you could bring back your Ridgescale Tusker for an effect similar to Durable Handicraft’s, for example, and still be able to use the Tusker to crew your Freighter.

Paul Seitz’s solution, on the other hand, takes a different route from the start:

  1. Tap Fairgrounds Trumpeter to crew Renegade Freighter, making it a 4/3.
  2. Cast Lifecraft Awakening for X=3, targeting Renegade Freighter, making it a 7/6.
  3. Cast Lifecrafter's Gift targeting Aetherborn Marauder, making it a 4/4 and the Freighter an 8/7.
  4. Block Gearshift Ace with Lawless Broker, Salivating Gremlins with Renegade Freighter, and Enraged Giant with Aetherborn Marauder.
  5. Avery's turn ends, and Fairgrounds Trumpeter gains a +1/+1 counter, making it a 3/3.
  6. Untap and draw Resourceful Return.

From this point, using the Fourth Bridge Prowler / Durable Handicraft play will win you the game: You’ll be attacking with a 4/4 Fairgrounds Trumpeter, a 6/6 Aetherborn Marauder, and a 10/9 trampling Renegade Freighter. (The latter might even give you the added bonus of taking down the Metalwork Colossus.)

Dominic Chan notes that if you take this route, you can actually win without casting Resourceful Return at all:

  1. Tap Fairgrounds Trumpeter to crew Renegade Freighter.
  2. Crack Durable Handicraft to put +1/+1 counters on Trumpeter, Freighter and Marauder.
  3. Cast Prey Upon, making Trumpeter and Colossus fight. Colossus gets marked with 4 damage, and our Trumpeter dies so our Renegade Freighter is now a GHOST TRAIN!(Is a Ghost Train a Train crewed by a Spirit, or a Train that has the Spirit creature type?)
  4. Attack with Aetherborn Marauder and GHOST TRAIN. Marauder will fly over for 6 damage, but Avery can gang block GHOST TRAIN with Filigree Crawler and Metalwork Colossus. However, since the Colossus was dealt 4 damage from Prey Upon earlier this turn, and GHOST TRAIN is a 10/9 trampler, Avery will still take at least 2 trample damage and lose.

Is it possible to kill the Metalwork Colossus, though? Russell Jones finds that the answer to this is “yes”, but it has an interesting requirement: You have to remove your own Aetherborn Marauder.

  1. Tap Fairgrounds Trumpeter to crew Renegade Freighter.
  2. Play Lifecraft Awakening for X=0. Servo Schematic becomes a 0/0 creature, dies, and triggers. You get a 1/1 Servo token. Durable Handicraft triggers; pay 1 to give the new token a +1/+1 counter and make it 2/2.
  3. Announce your blocking assignments:
  4. Allow first strike damage to happen. Gearshift Ace deals 2 damage to Lawless Broker, killing it and causing it to trigger. Put a +1/+1counter on Aetherborn Marauder, making it 3/3.
  5. Sacrifice Durable Handicraft to put +1/+1 counters on everything and use up all your lands.
  6. Allow the second strike to happen. Aetherborn Marauder deals 4 (with lifelink) and takes 4, Servo token deals 3 and takes 2, and Renegade Freighter deals 5 and takes 3. Salivating Gremlins deals 6 to you, offsetting the life gain but not by enough. After the smoke clears, Deadeye Harpooner, Bastion Enforcer, Enraged Giant, and Aetherborn Marauder are all dead, and you are at 1life.
  7. During the end step, Fairgrounds Trumpeter triggers and gets another+1/+1 counter to become 4/4.
  8. Go to your turn, untap, and draw Resourceful Return.
  9. Play Resourceful Return to get back Aetherborn Marauder and draw whatever.
  10. Play Aetherborn Marauder, which triggers.
    • In response to the trigger, tap Aetherborn Marauder to crew Renegade Freighter.
    • Still in response, play Lifecrafter's Gift on any of your creatures. The target will get two +1/+1 counters, and each of theother three creatures each get a counter. There are now a total of ten +1/+1 counters on the board.
    • Let the Marauder’s trigger resolve. Leave two +1/+1 counters on Renegade Freighter (it's guaranteed to have at least two), but move the other eight counters to Aetherborn Marauder, making it 10/10.

  11. Play Prey Upon to make your Aetherborn Marauder and the Metalwork Colossus fight each other. They both deal 10 damage and die, and you gain 10 life (to 11). Seriously, who plays Metalwork Colossus?
  12. Go to combat and swing with all three surviving creatures: your 2/2 Fairgrounds Trumpeter, 1/1 Servo token, and 6/5 Renegade Freighter. Renegade Freighter triggers and gets a further boost to become a 7/6 creature with trample.
  13. Avery has only a Filigree Crawler to block with.
    • He could, in theory, sacrifice it along with Cogworker's Puzzleknot to get Metalwork Colossus back in hand and thereby get a 1/1 Thopter to replace the 2/2 Crawler, but a) who would want to have a Metalwork Colossus in hand, and b) there's no advantage to be gained by making that trade, since none of your attackers have flying.
    • Either way, he won't be able to block more than one of your creatures. No matter where the block is positioned, it won't be able to sop up more than 2 of the incoming damage. He'll still take at least 8 damage (to 0), and lose.


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