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“I was having a good time for a while, but that was before it turned around,” CJ complains.
“Dude, seriously. Something went wrong for me at some point. It’s still going wrong.”
You glance at Mari, who’s shaking her head. “You’re starting to make excuses again,” she chides. “And you were doing so well in practice.”
“I did have this in the bag for a while,” CJ says.
“You kept a hand with no creatures,” Mari points out, “didn’t bother attacking with your flyers before the No Mercy hit the table, and only just remembered to ping his Soul Warden last turn. Did I miss anything?”
“Okay, so I made a few mistakes.”
Mari sighs. Despite all your effort in trying to teach CJ to play better games, it doesn’t looks like he’ll improve anytime soon. He’s already in the bottom bracket of this Unabridged Cube draft — a format containing one of each card ever printed — and you’ll probably never live this down unless he can pull off a miracle.
“So I’ll tap seven,” Bob says, “and I’ll cast Phage the Untouchable. Any counters?”
“You’re not supposed to tell him what’s in your hand!” Mari cries.
“Oh, okay,” CJ says. “Why?”
Mari’s look is better imagined than described.
“I guess I’ll end my turn, then,” Bob says. “You’ll ping one of my Spirit tokens?”
“Uh, yeah,” CJ says. “I meant to do that. But when a problem comes along, the better solution is a great topdeck.”
CJ untaps, draws his card for the turn, and then triumphantly slams it onto the table. “Oh, yeah! Slice and Dice for four to everything! Am I good, or am I good?”
You give Mari another glance. This time she stares at the board for a few seconds, gives you an exhausted look, and then facepalms hard. It takes you a while to see it, but when you do, you feel like doing the same thing.
By that time, CJ and Bob have moved on. You watch as they reconstruct their boards, completely oblivious to the play that could have been.
“He’ll learn soon enough,” you tell Mari. “I think.”
It is the start of your first main phase. Defeat Bob before the start of his next combat phase.
You are at 5 life, with the following cards in play:
- Skitter of Lizards (with a +1/+1 counter on it, and your Ghostly Wings attached)
- Alchemist's Apprentice (with your Fire Whip attached)
- Wizard Mentor
- Nevermaker
- 4 islands
- 2 mountains
- Mercadian Bazaar (with eight storage counters on it)
You have the following cards in your hand:
- Mystic Veil
- Slice and Dice (drawn during your draw step this turn)
You do not know the identities of any of the cards that are currently on top of your library.
Bob is at 18 life and has no cards in his hand. He has the following cards in play:
- Dega Disciple
- Mistmoon Griffin
- Disease Carriers
- Phage the Untouchable
- 2 Spirit tokens
- No Mercy
- 4 plains (all tapped)
- 4 swamps (three tapped)
If you think you’ve got a great solution in mind, don’t put it in the comments! Instead, send it to puzzles at gatheringmagic dot com with the subject line “Puzzle — Whip it Good” by 11:59 P.M. on Sunday, May 22, 2016. We’ll include the best ones in next week’s article along with the next puzzle!
Last Week’s Puzzle:
Correct solutions to last week’s puzzle were received from Russell Jones, Ryou Niji, Aaron Golas, Andrew Muravskyi, Wilson Freeman, Hyman Rosen, Matt Vorpahl, Subrata Sircar, Jordan Crittenden, Jared Thompson, James Parmenter, Bohdan Yarema, Donny Thurston, Andrew McLaren, Alexander Rogachev, Chadwick Bond, Kriz Lee, Paolo Botta, Jared Thompson and JD Oberholzer, Bill Murphy, Matthew Harvey, and Dominic Chan.
“The path to victory is quite straightforward,” Andrew Muravskyi points out. “Cast Radiant Flames for 4 and attack with Jeering Instigator and Temur Sabertooth, which are big and/or resilient enough to survive the sweeper. We have 10 power (two 4-power creatures, 1 from Strider Harness and 1 from Servant of the Scale's counter) and Judy's board is empty (if we steal Cyclone Sire, we get to control its death trigger and awaken a land). Flawless victory!“
“ . . . Except for the fact Radiant Flames can't go up to 4 naturally. Vryn Wingmare can help, but it creates a Catch-22 situation. If we tap our Scoured Barrens to cast Vryn Wingmare, we can no longer get four colors of mana. If only we could bounce a basic land to enable Fortified Village . . . enter Temur Sabertooth. This kitty can bounce any creature while making itself indestructible, and we just have to turn one of our lands into a creature.”
With that in mind, the plan becomes clear. Matt Vorpahl writes out this solution as follows:
- Tap two Forests and our Mountain to turn our Jeering Instigator face up, gaining control of Judy's Cyclone Sire. (It'll help us get all four colors.)
- Use the sacrifice ability Consecrated by Blood grants Jeering Instigator, sacrificing Dutiful Attendant and Cyclone Sire.
- Dutiful Attendant's death trigger brings Vryn Wingmare back to our hand.
- Cyclone Sire's death trigger animates one of our tapped Forests — and it has to be a tapped one.
- Tap a Forest and a Swamp to use Temur Sabertooth's ability, bouncing the animated Forest back to our hand. Sabertooth now has indestructible for this turn, allowing it to survive our eventual firestorm.
- Play the Fortified Village as our land for turn, revealing the Forest to have it enter untapped.
- Tap a Forest to move Strider Harness over to the Jeering Instigator, making it a 5/4.
- Tap Scoured Barrens and two Swamps to cast Vryn Wingmare. It'll make our non-creature spells cost
more, which we actually want. - Tap a Swamp for
, a Forest for
, Rugged Highlands for
, and Fortified Village for 
, casting Radiant Flames for 4. Hold priority here. - Before Radiant Flames resolves, use the sacrifice ability from Consecrated by Blood again, sacrificing Vryn Wingmare and Servant of the Scale. When Servant of the Scale dies, move its +1/+1 counter over to Jeering Instigator, making it a 6/5.
- Radiant Flames resolves, burning away our opponent's board while leaving our Instigator and Sabertooth alive as a 6/5 (with four damage) and a 4/3 with indestructible (also with four damage).
- Go to combat, where we attack for 10. Judy can't do anything about it and loses the game. Notably, you need to place Servant of the Scale’s +1/+1 counter on your face-up Jeering Instigator — otherwise it’ll regenerate from Radiant Flames’ four damage, and will tap itself.
That said, there are easier alternatives. “I think I have a simple solution to the puzzle,” Donny Thurston writes. “Don't bother with the land in hand!”
- Turn Jeering Instigator face up, gaining control of Patron of the Valiant.
- Sacrifice Servant of the Scale and Dutiful Attendant to Jeering Instigator (thanks to Consecrated by Blood). You will not be needing the regeneration.
- Add +1/+1 counter from Servant to Instigator.
- Return Eyeblight Assassin to hand from Attendant.
- Cast Radiant Flames with three colors, wiping the opponent's board except for Cyclone Sire and Unruly Mob. Temur Sabertooth dies.
- Cast Eyeblight Assassin and give Cyclone Sire -1/-1. With three damage already marked on it, this kills Sire.
- Opponent turns a land into a 3/3 creature.
- Attach Strider Harness (having fallen off the Sabertooth) to Patron (or Instigator, really).
- Swing for ten damage in the air, as Unruly Mob and the 3/3 land cannot block.
Finally, a variant of this solution allows you to take control of the biggest creature possible: Unruly Mob. In this variant, Wilson Freeman notes your attack isn’t entirely evasive; however, you don’t need that to be the case.
- Turn Jeering Instigator face up, taking Unruly Mob.
- Sacrifice Servant of the Scale and Dutiful Attendant to Consecrated by Blood; getting back Eyeblight Assassin, putting a +1/+1 counter on Jeering Instigator and two +1/+1 counters on Unruly Mob, making them a 5/4 and a 6/6, respectively.
- Play Radiant Flames for . This kills your opponent's board with the exception of Patron of the Valiant and Cyclone Sire.
- Play Eyeblight Assassin, giving Patron -1/-1. This kills Patron.
- Your opponent now only has Cyclone Sire facing down your 6/6 Unruly Mob, your 5/4 Temur Sabretooth, and your 5/4 Jeering Instigator. Attack with all three and they can only block one — you come through for at least ten damage.
The initial steps here are interchangeable as well — you could, for example, get an 8/8 Unruly Mob by playing Radiant Flames before everything else. That said, as Chadwick Bond notes, “Be certain that your Eyeblight Assassin goes for Patron and not for Cyclone Sire, or you'll have to deal with a surprise land blocker.”
“Ultimately,” Chadwick continues, “this game came down to one thing: Wrathing most of your opponent's board and stealing their fatties usually wins games. I also like the mental picture of a massive Unruly Mob chasing after Jeering Instigator.”
“Between the enchantment, the Strider Harness, and the +1/+1 counter, that Instigator is one beefy goblin.” Matt remarks. “He's probably riding into battle on the Sabertooth, too.”
